| Death in the family |
[04 Aug 2009|02:17pm] |
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mood |
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 crappy |
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My antie died in the morning today, and so begins 30 days of mourning. no dancing, no exsesive drinking and basically just spending time at home. I really wish i could send my mom back home for the funeral but there is simply not enough money coming in right now.
She died of stomach cancer that spread to all her organs. by the time she found out it was too late to treat it. She is leaving behing a husband and two boys, ages 5 and 12.
If you pray, keep my antie and her family in your prays.
thanks guys
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| What should i do? |
[07 Oct 2008|11:23pm] |
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mood |
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 drunk |
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music |
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Dj. Zany - S.E.X |
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I've been with the same guy for the last year, well almost a year and lately, my thoughts have been drifting off to other places, other people. Men, women, it doesn't matter. It's just that my thoughts keep ending up on just about anyone but him. I don't know what's going on. I want someone, i just don't know who but sometimes i think it's not him. Here's where the problem lies: even though a part of me screams for someone else, majority of me is so scared of losing him. I'm scared of continueing my life with out him. I had so many plans, plans that sound amasing but lately i've been so busy and so tired that i started to look past all of the romantisism, and just at the cold hard facts. What i realised is, i'm still young and all of the ideas about moving out with him and spending my entire life with him is doubtful. Some times i think i believe him, i bealive that he really does want to live with me, and to lvoe me, but other times, i know he's not ready to move out, and i know that if i stay here simply for him, it will be a huge mistake.
So i sit and dream. I dream because i'm too scared to make my dreams come to reality. I'm scared that if i act on my dreams, that he will disappear. I'm worried about not having him in my life.
So i sit and i dream. I dream about that sexy, dangerous and erotic Irish man, who will just sweep me of my feet with his aura and occasional passion. I want a man who will keep me on my toes, one who will never bore me. And that's difficult, considering how fast i lose interest. I want him to be so mystic, so interesting and so drunk that i won't be able to keep up. Yet, just like in a movie, i want to have thoes moments where there's jealousy, passion, love and care. I want it all, and i don't think he is able to give it all to me. I'm scared of making a desion based on this feeling i have for him, just to regret it afterwards. yet, I dont think i can be with out him....
that's a fun little dilema....
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[25 Jul 2008|11:24pm] |
In my point of view, a parent should help their child through no matter what. It doesn't matter if they agree with everyone else that it's a bad thing that they've done, they should just forget about their feeling just and be there. just hug their child, just hold them close untill they stopped crying.
That's all i wanted...
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[29 Oct 2005|01:29am] |
you know what? there arent that many times in my life when in serious. But when im standing in the middle of a crowed club, with all of the people i know and still have to keep my reputation in tack, and im screaming at you and slap you across the face, how can you even doubt that im one hundren percent serious?
jesus fucking christ
peace out, i'm going to go get intoxicated and go clubbing.
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[24 Oct 2005|10:12pm] |
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Leave one memory of you and me together. It doesn't matter if I know you a little or a lot, anything you remember! Next, post this in your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you.
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[26 Aug 2005|04:23am] |
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i cant sleep. Its past 4 am. I'm tired, longing to sleep, yeti can not fall asleep. what the fuck...?
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[29 Apr 2005|09:19pm] |
I'm way too drunk for my own good. I made out with my BEST friend's ex-boyfriend.
I'm so alone, so horny and so hurt. I want to be loved by someone who will really love me.
my face is numb.
I'm getting so fat that even Luke doesn;t like me. Random guys like me but the guy i want, doesnt want to have anything to do with me. GREEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAATTT..
I'm gonna go puke for a while and then go home and sleep.
leave ma comment and make me feel better.... please?
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[17 Jan 2005|03:34pm] |
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"I broke my body and shared it equally among the men. And as Jesus did, i fullfilled their hunger." - Etty Hillesum
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[12 Jan 2005|04:53pm] |
If you see this post, but don't see any more after this one, it means you're either not on my friends list or have been cut on January 12, 2005. It's not because i don't like you, it's beacuse you're lazy and haven't commented to stay. So either comment, or forget about me.
ps. If you can see this, and the following fucked up post i'm about to make, just ignore it and go back to doing whatever the fuck you were doing.
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